A Poem and finally, it's probably going to happen.

No, our angels won't be around forever and I think that if anyone claims to "love them" they should show it NOW. Don't wait until it's too late.. and remember when you act like he doesn't KNOW or is does not matter so its not worth your time to visit or spend time with, it will be YOUR fault when he is gone. NOt MY fault because I have never kept anyone from visiting him. There will be no excuses. He may not get mad and continue to live peacefully without your love or help but Ganny feels the hurt for him when he is treated differently than the "NORMAL" kids in the family. Ganny has to deal with the rejection for him.

Occasionally, we are graced with the presence of an earth bound Angel.
They are unable to stay with us for long, but while they do, they bring unprecedented joy and happiness to all they touch.
While they are here, we bask in their goodness and marvel at their contribution to the world.
When they leave, we are left with the devastation that comes with losing such a wonderful being, but we must remember the earth bound Angels are not ours to keep.
They are ours to enjoy, learn from, and behold until they return home.
Author unknown

MS Ranks 51 out of States as for services they provide for children with disabilities. 51 being THE WORST. I have been on the waiting list for 6 years for help with Matthew. Neither I not my husband have insurance or any hope or retirement security. If something happened to me tomorrow, there is NO ONE that would give up their life to help with Matthew.
I am about 85% sure that I am taking him and moving to VA within the next few months. Really don't care who gets upset and pretty sure that no one will miss him. I can get the EDCD waiver for him without being on a waiting list. Even have a place to rent for a while so I can establish residency. My family will only be 20 minutes away. I know they will help because they did when they were here. I am going to do what I have to do to get him there. He will qualify for more than just the one waiver. He will get a LOT of help and the resource he needs to live a healthy life. He is to the point of being totally bed ridden if I don't get help soon and that is not the life he is going to live. I have put my life on hold for 8 years in MS the only thing that has happened is he's gotten bigger, more to handle, I still don't have any help, no family to help on either side so I hope no one feels they have the right to say anything. I am doing what I best for Matthew and our future.  May even have to get into somebody's pockets to qualify for the waiver but I dont care about that either. My husband and I have talked about his for a long, long, time and it looks like I am the one going to make the first move. I will noting our steps along the way so if anyone else finds themselves in our predicament, they can see what I did because I have big plans and they all include Matthew, and my husband. My kids are grown and make their own decisions, have their own families. I can't stand to see Matthew lay around most of the day.. I can't even take him to the pool anymore because NO ONE has time for him.
Some may say, well you deserve what you got, you new it when you were GIVEN custody... NO I didn't My husband & I was given custody believing that his mom, dad, family, my family, my kids, etc would be around to help as they said they would but little by little everyone slowly thought I can do it all myself. Then they say "Oh you are so strong". You know what? I am so SICK of hearing that. Now if someone would just give us the money to move, that would be wonderful but I don't see that happening either. Everything has always been a fight or a battle to get what is best for Matthew but I have come armed and ready.
Anyway. Look our VA, here we COME!

Happy Mother's Day/ A poem to remind you that your mother won't be around forever.

Mother’s Love

When you were 1 year old, she fed you and bathed you.
- You thanked her by crying all the night.
When you were 2 years old, she taught you to walk.
- You thanked her by running away when she called.
When you were 3 years old, she made all your meals with love.
- You thanked her by tossing your plate on the floor.
When you were 4 years old, she gave you some crayons.
- You thanked her by coloring the dinning room table.
When you were 5 years old, she dressed you for the holidays.
- You thanked her by looping into the nearest pile of mud.
When you were 6 years old, she walked you into school.
- You thanked her by screaming, “I’M NOT GOING”.
When you were 7 years old, she bought you a baseball.
- You thanked her by throwing it through the next-door-neighbor window.
When you were 8 years old, she handed you an ice cream.
- You thanked her by dripping it all over you lap.
When you were 9 years old, she paid for piano lessons.
- You thanked her by never even bothering to practice it.
When you were 10 years old, she drove you all day, from soccer to gymnastic to one birthday party after another.
- You thanked her by jumping out of the car and never looking back.
When you were 11 years old, she took you and your friends to the movies.
- You thanked her by asking to sit in the different row.
When you were 12 years old, she warned you not to watch certain TV shows.
- You thanked her by waiting until she left the house.
When you were 13, she suggested a haircut that was becoming.
- You thanked her by telling her she had no taste.
When you were 14, she paid for a month away at summer camp.
- You thanked her by forgetting to write a single letter.
When you were 15, she came home from work, looking for a hug.
- You thanked her by having your bedroom door locked.
When you were 16, she taught you how to drove her car.
- You thanked her by taking it every chance you could.
When you were 17, she was expecting an important call.
- You thanked her by being on the phone all night.
When you were 18, she cried at your school graduation.
- You thanked her by staying out partying until dawn.
When you were 19, she paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus, carried your bags.
- You thanked her by saying good-bye outside the dorm so you wouldn’t be embarrassed in front of you friends.
When you were 20, she asked whether you were seeing anyone.
- You thanked her by saying “It’s none of you business”.
When you were 21, she suggested certain careers for your future.
- You thanked her by saying “I don’t want to be like you”.
When you were 22, she hugged you at your college graduation.
- You thanked her by asking whether she could pay for a trip to Europe.
When you were 23, she gave you furniture for your first apartment.
- You thanked her by telling your friend it was ugly.
When you were 24, she met your fiancee and asked about your plans for the future.
- You thanked her by glaring and growling, “Muuhh-ther, please!”
When you were 25, she helped to pay for your wedding, and she cried and told how deeply she loved you.
- You thanked her by moving halfway across the country.
When you were 30, she called with some advice on the baby.
- You thanked by telling her, “Things are different now.”
When you were 40, she called to remind you of a relative’s birthday.
- You thanked her by saying you were “really busy right now.”
When you were 50, she fell ill and needed you to take care of her.
- You thanked her by reading about the burden parents become to their children.
And then, one day, she quietly died. And everything you never did, came crashing down like thunder on your heart.
If she’s still around, never forget to love her more than ever. And if she’s not, remember her unconditional love
In Picture: My mama Ruth and great-grandson Brendan

This Grandma's spirit will never be broken.

If nothing is going well, call your grandmother. ~Italian Proverb
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Grandchildren are a grandparent's link to the future, and grandparents are the child's link to the past.
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I may not be rich, but I do have priceless grandchildren.
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Life is easier if you hear the steps of grandchildren walking beside you!
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Here's some little things I found on the net about grandma's. I loved my grandma and miss her very much. One thing that I remember about her is that she always would take time to just sit outside and talk to me. But remember that grandma's are not around for ever. One day YOU will be a grandparent and you will see that a grandparents love is MUCH different than any love you have ever known.. not the same as a mama's love, a sister's love, a love for your own child, an aunt or uncle's love, or a dad's love. Each love is totally different. I have found that the way I treated others has come back to haunt me 10fold and no one is immune to the same thing happening to them. You are not too good, too rich, too pretty, or too good of a mom or dad for it to come right back on you and bite you in the butt. So be careful how you treat others because KARMA will get the last word.


Grandchildren fill my heart with pleasure.
Each a joy for me to treasure!
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That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his/her little fist, you're hooked for life.
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Grandmas are for stories about things of long ago.
Grandmas are for caring about all the things you know...
Grandmas are for rocking you and singing you to sleep.
Grandmas are for giving you nice memories to keep...
Grandmas are for knowing all the things you're dreaming of...
But, most importantly of all, Grandmas are for love. ~ Author Unknown ~